Torn in Two Read online

  Shawn released her. “Can we please just talk?”

  “Fine.”

  He sat. “I need you to understand this from my point of view. I was worried. In all the time I have known you, Sky, you have never done something like this. How would you feel if I just up and disappeared?”

  That took some of the air out of Skylar. She knew if Shawn went missing like she did, she would turn over every rock to find him. “I get it. I really do. I should have at least told you. But you didn't have to follow me.”

  He started getting slightly irritated. “I needed to see that you were okay. For now, let us put that to the side. We have other things to discuss...like you possibly having feelings for me, and how you went and fucked someone else. How can you say ‘Oh, Shawn, I think my feelings are changing’ in one breath, then say, ‘I sorta had sex with somebody’ in the next? Who does that?”

  “I don't know what to tell you, Shawn. I am being honest. I started looking at you a little differently after the whole fiasco with Ryan. Then I got here and, well...Dylan made me feel alive again. I don't know where any of this is headed, but I do know I don't want to hurt anybody.”

  “Well, for your information, I have had different thoughts about you recently. I don't know how to explain it, but I would like to explore it.”

  “Wait…what do you mean? Wanting to explore what? I’m not even sure I want anything with anyone right now.” Skylar’s ire was starting to show.

  Shawn sighed, looking out the window. “Come on. It’s a nice day. Let's go for a walk and talk some more. Maybe we can figure this whole thing out.” When she nodded, they got up from the table and headed out the door.

  Walking the now familiar streets, Skylar put her hand in Shawn's. “I am sorry for worrying you. I didn't mean to. I just wanted some time for myself, to think things through. Now I am not sure if that was a wise decision.”

  Looking into those beautiful brown eyes, he saw the sincerity in them. Not knowing how else to help, he kissed her lips gently. When she didn’t pull away, he deepened the kiss. Rubbing his tongue along her lower lip, enticing her with a slight nip, she opened up to him. Their tongues started that sweet dance of seduction.

  Damn. Shawn makes me tingle, too.

  “Skylar, is that you?”

  At the voice, Skylar jumped away from him, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. Narrowing his eyes at the newcomer, Shawn mused, Damn. Is that the dude she had sex with? Deciding to try and play nice, he held out his hand. “Hi. My name is Shawn, and you are?”

  Slowly, brow furrowed, he shook the offered hand. “Dylan. I was just on my way over to see what Skylar was up to today.” He looked at her. “So how should I take this after our conversation yesterday? Does this mean you're not confused anymore?”

  “Dylan, I can explain…”

  Shawn looked at her, his anger starting to rise. “He doesn't need an explanation. It isn't like you promised him anything… Did you?”

  “I haven't promised anybody anything. You both need to stop acting like you own me.”

  “Having been your friend for as long as I have, I know I don't own you. I would like to believe you would be a little more considerate of me, though,” Shawn huffed.

  Dylan placed his hands on his hips, giving a cocky smile. “I don't know how to tell you this, Shawn. You may be her friend, but I am so much more. I got to know Skylar intimately.”

  “Dylan, we only fucked.”

  “Yes, we did, but we also spent hours talking and getting to know each other. We connected. Tell me you didn't feel it and I will walk away right now.”

  “I would be lying if I said I didn't feel something. I am just not sure what it is.”

  “Didn't you just tell me this morning that you weren't sure how you felt about me?" Fuming, Shawn spit out, “Well, if that’s changed, I will leave you to it.” Spinning around and walking away, all Shawn could think was, Is she playing a game? How can she say she might have feelings for me, then turn around and tell that jerk she felt something for him?

  “I should go after him. Try to explain,” a dejected-looking Skylar stated.

  “No. Let him cool off. Why don't you come with me? I know Sheba would love to see you. I promise. Nothing will happen unless you want it to.”

  “Thank you, but no. Right now, I just want to be alone. I don't want to hurt either of you, so I have some thinking to do.”

  “It is getting colder out, might even start to snow. Just come to the house. I’ll leave you to yourself. If you want to talk, I will be there. I’ll even make hot chocolate.” Dylan smiled. Sheba was happy to see Skylar, jumping on her as soon as she walked through the door. She laughed, instantly feeling better.

  “So, would you like some hot chocolate, coffee, anything?” Dylan gently probed.

  “Some coffee would be great. Thank you. I do feel a little chilled,” Skylar responded, looking everywhere but at Dylan.

  Not knowing what to say, he simply nodded and went to work making the coffee. I won’t push her, but why can't she see how good we could be together? If she wanted Shawn, wouldn't it have happened a long time ago? Deciding to take the bull by the horns, he asked in a soft voice, “What are you thinking right now, Skylar?”

  Looking up at him, eyes radiating sadness, she sighed. “I don't want to hurt either of you. Even in the short time we have known each other, you have become important to me, Dylan. However, Shawn has been important to me for years.”

  “How come you two didn't get together before this?”

  “To be honest, until recently, I never looked at him that way. He has always been and, hopefully, always will be my best friend. It wasn't until all this Ryan bullshit that I realized I may have different feelings for him. He has been my rock through everything that has gone on. When he first moved in next door, I thought he was a cute kid. As our friendship grew, when I felt like I had hit rock bottom, he was there to pull me up, dust me off, and push me into seeing the situation for what it was.”

  “Then why run away? Why not stay and see what develops? Even though I've only known you a short time, I can't see you doing what we did the other day on a regular basis. I mean, don't get me wrong. I want to do it again, but why did it happen?”

  “I am always doing what I think other people expect of me. I very rarely, if ever, do something just for me. For the most part, I put others first, which hasn't always benefited me. When I saw you, I felt something I hadn't in a long time. I can't explain it, but it was there. After we spent the day together, it felt stronger. When we came back here for lunch, I decided to do something I wanted. Afterward, well…you saw what happened. The confusion and so on. Now, here we are, and I am unsure of what to say or do.”

  “As flattered as I am, the only question I have for you is with all the talking we did, why didn't you tell me about Shawn? I mean, you told me about Ryan and your past relationships, but not once did you mention your best friend.”

  She shrugged. “Maybe I was being selfish. Maybe I thought if I talked about Shawn, we wouldn’t do anything. I just wanted to do for me for once. I am sorry if this hurts you, but it is the truth.”

  Dylan sighed, looking at the floor. “So I was just a quick fuck then?”

  “Maybe that was what I wanted it to be at first. But after getting to know you, I knew it could be more. Hence the confusion and me leaving. I am still confused. I can see myself with both of you, even though I have known Shawn longer. I don't know. There is just something about you. I’m not even sure I want a relationship at this point.”

  Not sure what to say, Dylan walked around the island and wrapped Skylar in his arms. She grabbed onto him like she never wanted to let go. Dylan leaned in for a kiss, but Skylar pulled away.

  “I really should be going. It’s starting to snow.”

  Reluctantly, Dylan nodded. “Let me walk you back. I can walk Sheba while I’m at it.”

  “No, that’s not necessary. I’ll be fine. I will call you to let you know I got
back safely.”

  Grabbing the leash, he shook his head. Sheba jumped to her feet. “Come on, girl, before it gets too slippery out.” What am I going to do? Dylan mused. We would be really good together. I haven't wanted anybody like this since Pam passed away. Sure, I have been approached by pretty women, but none of them have interested me like Skylar.

  Chapter Five

  After a few hours of brooding, Shawn realized he had made a mistake by walking away. What was I thinking? Instead of standing my ground and fighting for Skylar, I walked away like a dumbass, leaving that dickwad with her. She isn't back yet, so does that mean she is with him? Shawn walked out and looked up and down the street. Not seeing her, he headed back into the B&B. If that kiss was any indication of what could be, I need to keep kissing her. I was ready to jump her bones right in the middle of the sidewalk and didn't give a fuck. I’m going to have to figure out how to get Skylar to realize how good we can be together. Deciding to wait for her to return, he took a seat in the dining room. Five minutes later, he saw her coming through the door. Shawn jumped up, practically running to her.

  “Where have you been? I was worried, even going back out to look for you. Let me guess. You were with him,” he practically shouted.

  “Shawn, calm the fuck down. Not that I owe you any explanation, but yes, I was with Dylan.” She held her hands up when he opened his mouth. “And before you start acting like an ass again, all we did was talk.”

  “Well, excuse me for giving a fuck. I thought that was what friends did. Please, forgive me for being concerned,” Shawn sarcastically replied.

  “You’re being a smartass again. If...and that is a big if...you can be civil, we can talk. If not, I will just say good night and head to my room. The choice is yours.”

  How did I become the bad guy? Shit, am I not supposed to be concerned for her? He threw his hands up in frustration. “Fine.” Sitting down on the couch in the living room, they both averted their eyes. In all the years they had known each other, never had there been such awkwardness.

  Skylar blew out a breath. “Shawn, when I took off, I truly just needed time to get my head on straight. I thought I did something wrong with Ryan. But I am coming to the realization that it wasn't me. It was him. Yes, I should have realized something was wrong when he started shutting down, but I honestly thought all couples went through a rough patch every now and then. When I saw the note, I thought, Here we go again. Someone else to just up and leave. After you left that night, I started to reflect about how you have always been there no matter what. That is when I started looking at you differently.”

  “So why not stay and discuss it, see if there is anything, rather than run away? You should know me well enough by now, Sky. I would never purposely hurt you, never push you.”

  “I do acknowledge all that, but it wouldn't have been right for me. I didn't want to question whether I was just turning to you as a rebound. When I met Dylan, I wasn't looking to get involved with anyone. Sure, I thought he was hot, but I realized I needed to do something for me. As we talked, I felt a connection. Granted, it’s not like ours, but it is there. I figured if he and I fucked and I never saw him again, no harm, no foul.”

  Shawn snorted. “Yeah, well, we see how well that worked. I have to admit, I didn't start to see you in a different light until the note asswipe left. That was when it hit me. You are what I am looking for. Yes, it kind of shocked me. The difference is I would have waited, giving you time to heal, then approached you on it. I never expected you to disappear and find some stranger to fuck.”

  “Why can't you fucking understand? I did that for me and me alone. I don't need your damn permission to fuck. If that is going to be a problem, this conversation is over.”

  “No, it isn't a problem. Continue,” Shawn growled.

  “Where was I? Oh yeah. I didn’t figure Dylan and I would have a spark. It just happened. Before you go blowing up again, yes, when we kissed, I felt something, so just get your shit straight.”

  Shawn narrowed his eyes at her. “May I ask why I am getting this fucking attitude? All I have done is show concern for a friend. I didn't ask you to start looking at me differently. I didn't tell you to fuck someone and develop feelings for him. Don't take your bullshit out on me. I didn't do this. You did. Now, I am going to walk away before I say something I will either regret or you will twist up and use against me. Have a damn good night.” Getting up and walking away, all Shawn could do was shake his head in disgust. I don't know who the fuck she thinks she is. I didn't ask for this shit. We have argued more this last week than we have in all the years we have known each other. That can't be good. Maybe trying for more isn't worth losing our friendship over. Dammit, now I’m the one confused. This is all her fault. Should have just kept my happy ass home.

  Watching him walk away, Skylar slowly got up, blowing out a breath. What the hell? Since when did he and I disagree like this? I mean, we’ve had our share of differences, but never like this. He acts like I did this shit on purpose. Doesn't he understand what I’m going through right now? Dammit, I am not just going to let him walk away. If he meant what he said, I am going to fight for this. Walking a little faster, she stopped at his room. Not even knocking, she tried the knob, finding it unlocked. Hearing the shower running, she wasn't sure what to do. Should I sit on the bed and wait? Join him? To hell with it. I am going for what I want. Smirking, she took off her socks and shoes, then padded over to the bathroom door. Opening it slowly, she quietly walked in and closed it, standing there until he noticed her. Ever so slowly, she started to strip, first taking off her sweater, then her jeans.

  Gulping, Shawn couldn't believe what he was seeing. What is this little minx up to? Whatever it is I am thoroughly enjoying the show. Walking into the shower wearing just her bra and panties, she grabbed the soap. Putting a dollop on one hand and rubbing them together, she proceeded to wash his chest, moving her hands in circles. His hair tickled her fingers. Leaning forward, she lightly ran her tongue over his nipples, nipping softly. His breath came out ragged when her hands traveled toward his dick. Not able to take it anymore, Shawn pushed Skylar against the wall. He kissed her passionately, trying to put everything he felt into it. Working his way down, kissing and nipping, he pulled her bra strap down with his teeth. Taking her nipple in his mouth, he sucked so hard that when he pulled away, he heard a pop. Pushing her panties aside, he started to rub her clit with his thumb. Placing kisses on her belly, he made his way to her pussy. His tongue stroked her, making her knees weak.

  “Shawn, I need you inside me.”

  Grabbing his face, she pulled him up, then shoved her lacy panties down. When he placed the head of his cock at her entrance, she wrapped her legs around him as his thickness slowly entered her.

  “God, you feel so fucking tight, Sky. I am not sure I can last,” Shawn grunted, thrusting hard.

  “Don’t stop. I am so close, Shawn. Mmm…” Losing all ability to speak, Skylar just moaned as she came harder than she ever had. With a couple more thrusts, Shawn followed right behind her. Not saying a word, she unwrapped her shaky legs from around his torso, then finished washing him and herself.

  Getting out first, Shawn grabbed the towel, dried himself, then helped Skylar out and dried her off, as well. No words were spoken, both lost in their own thoughts. That was incredible, Shawn thought, amazed. Why haven't I noticed her in this possible capacity before? I am in love with her. I have no doubt about that. How am I going to make her forget about Dylan and just be with me? I can't force her. That would just push her right into his arms. I am going to have to play this very cool and be cautious. I don't want to scare her away.

  “Sky, spend the night. Let us continue what we started.”

  She smiled at him. Indescribable…that’s the only word I can think of right now. Who knew he and I would be so damn good together. I am not sure how this is going to change our friendship. Maybe it will make it better. I still have a lot of thinking to do. What about Dylan? Maybe I
will date both of them and see what happens. I do know that sex will only cloud my judgment, so no more of that for any of us until I come to a decision. As good as the sex is, I have to be strong and resist. I know they will use sex to persuade me, even though I initiated it both times. I truly have to figure out who is best for me, while trying not to hurt the other.

  “Sorry, Shawn. I don’t think that’s a good idea. As much as I enjoyed this, it can't happen again until I know what the hell I am doing. I don't want to hurt anybody. I have to figure out what is best for me.”

  He threw his hands up, frustrated. “But how can there be any doubt left? This was the icing on the cake, in my opinion. I mean, we have known each other forever. How can this not be the natural next step for us?”

  “Shawn, it isn't that I don't feel something for you. I do. My problem is I also feel something for Dylan. Plus, it’s so soon after Ryan. I need to make sure my feelings are genuine. It doesn't make sense to me. That is what I really need to understand.”